Monday, January 11, 2010

Amish Friendship Bread

No, I have not been abducted by aliens and this certainly isn't turning into a cooking blog. The thought of that makes me roll on the floor and giggle. 

About 10 days ago, my friend Uncle Larry (no relation, and not a man), gave me a gallon size Ziploc bag of goo with a date on it.  With a smile and a straight face she told me it was "Amish Friendship Bread" and it was DELICIOUS!  She then forwarded me instructions that went something like this:
  • Days 1-7 mush the bag
  • Day 7 add flour, sugar, and milk
  • Day 8-9 mush the bag
  • Day 10-bake it and make mini-starters for all your friends

When she first started talking about this stuff I thought she had to be joking.  I just got done reading Bless Your Heart, Tramp by Celia Rivenbark and she had an essay dedicated to this very subject (very funny book, I recommend it).  I thought maybe she read the same thing I did and was poking fun at the people that brought in the bags of goo to share with the office.  Nope.  She really makes it and now she was sharing it with me.

For the last 10 days I have paid more attention to this bag of goo than I have my own children.  I have mushed, I have mixed, and I have finally baked.   I really tried hard not to be skeeved out that the bag did not need to be chilled.  The stuff eventually took over my kitchen.



The smell was intoxicating.  I was finally getting excited to see what all the hoopla was about with this stuff.  Maybe, just maybe all of this work would payoff to make a foodgasm-worthy bread.

It came time to pull it out of the oven and it looked like a dirty diaper.  It was baked around the edges but the middle was all liquid.  It flopped.  I baked the thing 30 minutes longer than the recipe called and it still wasn't done.  That is when I hung up my apron and called it quits.

Friendship bread my ass!  Tomorrow I am marching into her office and ask her why she hates me (because why would you do that to a friend???!!).  Then I am going to distribute my own bags of goo**evil laugh**



Oh yeah....before I forget....I did Shred this morning.  Day 3 is D-O-N-E!  Tomorrow should be interesting because will have to cross it off the list around 4:30AM and I have committed to a date with the gym over lunch.

22 comments:

Johnny Vu said...

I am doing the same thing with the family... Baba's cookie recipe...

MCM Mama said...

LOL! I'm thanking my lucky stars I live nowhere near you! ;o)

Keep up the good work with Jillian!

Sarah said...

I have never tried making that...I am thinking I probably won't. :) I want to know how Uncle Larry is a girl!....bet there is a good story there!

Zoë said...

Ooooo, this post makes me giggle! I got the goo a couple years ago and made the bread for two rounds. It's pretty good, but it does take longer than the directions say.

But you know what? I keep the two leftover bags of amish goo in my freezer and they are AMAZING ice packs for post-run aches! :) Just a thought.

Jess said...

Glad Uncle Larry is not my "friend"!

teacherwoman said...

All that work and then it flopped? Geez.

D10 said...

Sorry to hear about the bread. it usually is really good.

You are off to such a strong start with the shred. Keep it going.

Lisa said...

lol

everyone falls for the "friendship bread" once.

just once.

Shosh said...

HAHA OH no. I would not be happy about that either especially after all the care that you had shown it. Did your friend give you any reason as to why that would happen? Just say no to Friendship Bread :-)

Lily on the Road said...

LOL at Zoë ~ great idea about using the goo as Ice Packs...good thinking girl!

Al's CL Reviews said...

I got friendship bread once.
I was grossed out, so I threw it away.

Yay on day 3

Megsie said...

We were in the Amish Bread circuit years ago, before we had kids. It is SO DELICIOUS. But. Once you get hooked in, it is hard to stop. If you don't have the starter, you can't make the bread. Did I mention it is SO DELICIOUS? So we made bread, and bread and bread...and I always had a starter on my counter top. Finally we were SICK of the bread. Could not eat another bite. BUT. If we didn't have the starter....oh, well we chucked it. And I have only done it once since, one loaf, and pitched the starters again. Really, it is good that it flopped. You don't need another commitment.

Delane said...

LOL..yeah that stuff is gross

Carolina John said...

pass the balls of goo on to someone else. that's a fantastic strategy.

lifestudent said...

Wow, you are determined. A friend of mine gave me one of those cookie in a jar things - all the ingredients in a pretty jar and I just had to add water and eggs and make the cookies. That jar sat on my shelf for one year.

Tamzin said...

LOL LOL LOL!! I can't that stuff! Anything that can be on the courner that long and be consumable is suspect in my eyes!

:)

Deanna - The Unnatural Mother said...

so what happened?? did you not cook it long enough?

Lisa "One Mom's Weight Loss" said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lisa "One Mom's Weight Loss" said...

I have been given that Amish goop in a ziploc before and wondered if it worked. Of course, I never stuck with the stuff and followed through.

Funny story :)

})i({ RunnerGirl/RedZone said...

Oh my goodness... this was the FUNNIEST post I have read in the longest time from anyone. Thank you for the laughs... I am crying over here!

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